I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
