I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
