So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize