maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
