You just made me feel so damn special
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
