She is in my trunk
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
