i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
