Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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