A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
