Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
