it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
