I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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