I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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