Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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