i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
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