you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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