True but thats because hes a fetus.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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