You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
last night I used snow as a chaser
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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