i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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