Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
as a side note pls kill me
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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