His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
