Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
