just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
We have started to decorate penises.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
