i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize