we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
