Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Randomize
