your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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