Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Randomize