im gay
i know
yea but for you.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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