Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
