She's JV to your varsity
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
