What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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