you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Sext me about skeletons
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
