All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
i think i just lost a toe
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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