She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
