She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
