He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
