3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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