Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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