Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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