Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
