Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Randomize
