Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
