I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
