Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
