is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Randomize
