I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
