please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
