Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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