She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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