Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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